This last week I have had a lot of time to ponder life and my immortality. Yesterday was my friend Sharla's memorial service. I can honestly say that I went into it a little worried. She was only 30, she left behind 5 young children and a grieving husband. It had the potential to be difficult and heartbreaking.
And it was, it was both of those things, but it was gorgeous and light hearted as well. I laughed, cried, reminisced, and held Dj close. Through all of this experience, upon hearing of her death and getting through the days that followed I believe the reason I cried was for Michael, her children, and the idea of being without Dj.
I've decided that Mormon memorials are the greatest kind to go to. I've been to a Catholic funeral before as well as non denominational Christian one and they were the most depressing things..
I've also decided that I hope if something like this is to ever happen to my family that Dj and I have a child. Though imagining trying to get along in the world as a single parent doesn't sound ideal I feel that having a little piece of my best friend, my love, would help the grieving process.
I was able to talk to a coworker about death this week as I confided in her about Sharla's death. I told her that it was okay to be sad, heartbroken that she's gone, that it seems like such a long time before we're able to see her again. But they're the lucky ones. She's up there, spending time with all her friends and family who have ever passed away. She's not subject to physical pain. She's in God's presence. And she will be able to watch over her children in a way she never could before.
Life truly is made better by having faith and a testimony of Heavenly Father and the next life.
This is a quote that was shared yesterday, both Sharla Prior and Winnie the Pooh said it best:
"If there ever is a tomorrow we're not together...There is something that you must always remember. You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. But the most important thing is, even if we are apart...I'll always be with you."
I love my husband, my best friend. I love my life with him. I love that I have eternity to share with him and that no matter what happens in our life, in the end, he's mine forever and we never have to be apart for longer than a few moments.
Sunday, August 26, 2012
Saturday, August 18, 2012
Eternal Perspective
This week was supposed to be the end to what I've been coining as 'hell week' at work. Please don't be offended by the name, it really was the worst seven days of my 11 months so far at this job. For about two months I was training with the authorizations and eligibility guys to take over his job for seven of the longest, torturous work days of my life. So on top of my daily duties I needed to take on all of his. I survived. Barely, but I did it and I am now the official back up. Luckily for me Donny, the auth guy, didn't get lost on his road trip to Idaho and back and came back to work.
Thursday was my first day of doing only my work again and it glorious.
It came to an abrupt end though, as we came home from work and learned to our utter heartbreak that a good friend had passed away that morning in her sleep. She was one of those people who just loved life and adored her husband and children. Even with five kids I remember her talking about how much she was in love with her husband and her life. Nothing got her down. She loves Disneyland, her best friend Leah, taking photos, and kissing her husband. She's thirty years old and she has five kids under the age of 5 with twin boys who aren't yet a year.
There is nothing that makes me cling to Dj harder than the thought of spending the rest of my life on earth without him. There is nothing that makes me more grateful for my eternal marriage than coming face to face with the idea of eternity in the wake of someone's death. This will be our second funeral in the past few months and I am heartbroken for Mike and Delany, Natalie, Kherrington, Daxton, and Parker. I know Heavenly Father will help them through it, I know that there are purposes in all that He does, it's having the eternal perspective that is difficult.
With all the things that I've had to experience in life, all the trials, heartbreaks, and mountains I have had to climb I've always come out on top. It's been painful, uncomfortable, miserable, and downright impossible at times but I look back and know that I am blessed.
Death, poverty, and the depravities of men will come our way. Terrible things that we never imagined could happen to us will indeed happen to us. They'll push us down, beat us until there is nothing left and our light is almost gone. The real decision for us comes in whether we choose to stand again. We can't let our wounds fester and infect us, we must let them scar over and heal. Life is hard. Good people experience bad things. But we are loved and cared for by someone more intelligent and more powerful than us and despite the things that he doesn't protect us from He loves us and wants the best for us.
So this weekend, I think of all my heartbreaks, all my triumphs, and all my blessings. I will hold onto Dj a little tighter, love him a little more, and look for the silver linings in the dark rain clouds that may come our way.
Love you Sharla and Mike and all your lovely kiddos, there will always be a special place in my heart for your family because of the kindness you've always shown to me.
Thursday was my first day of doing only my work again and it glorious.
It came to an abrupt end though, as we came home from work and learned to our utter heartbreak that a good friend had passed away that morning in her sleep. She was one of those people who just loved life and adored her husband and children. Even with five kids I remember her talking about how much she was in love with her husband and her life. Nothing got her down. She loves Disneyland, her best friend Leah, taking photos, and kissing her husband. She's thirty years old and she has five kids under the age of 5 with twin boys who aren't yet a year.
There is nothing that makes me cling to Dj harder than the thought of spending the rest of my life on earth without him. There is nothing that makes me more grateful for my eternal marriage than coming face to face with the idea of eternity in the wake of someone's death. This will be our second funeral in the past few months and I am heartbroken for Mike and Delany, Natalie, Kherrington, Daxton, and Parker. I know Heavenly Father will help them through it, I know that there are purposes in all that He does, it's having the eternal perspective that is difficult.
With all the things that I've had to experience in life, all the trials, heartbreaks, and mountains I have had to climb I've always come out on top. It's been painful, uncomfortable, miserable, and downright impossible at times but I look back and know that I am blessed.
Death, poverty, and the depravities of men will come our way. Terrible things that we never imagined could happen to us will indeed happen to us. They'll push us down, beat us until there is nothing left and our light is almost gone. The real decision for us comes in whether we choose to stand again. We can't let our wounds fester and infect us, we must let them scar over and heal. Life is hard. Good people experience bad things. But we are loved and cared for by someone more intelligent and more powerful than us and despite the things that he doesn't protect us from He loves us and wants the best for us.
So this weekend, I think of all my heartbreaks, all my triumphs, and all my blessings. I will hold onto Dj a little tighter, love him a little more, and look for the silver linings in the dark rain clouds that may come our way.
Love you Sharla and Mike and all your lovely kiddos, there will always be a special place in my heart for your family because of the kindness you've always shown to me.
Tuesday, August 14, 2012
Zucchinni
I don't have a garden.
When I moved to the country, my every intention was to plant some veggies and enjoy the heck out of them. The road to no where is paved with good intentions though and my little plot of land is now growing weeds and looking very wild and unyielding. Luckily, Kerry, my friend and now neighbor has a garden and she graciously blessed me with a huge zucchini. I realized though, while I was shredding that bad boy that I was in way over my head and I couldn't possibly make that much zucchini bread.
Short story, I made waaaaay too much zucchini bread with a recipe I'd never tried and now I'm stuck bitterly eating zucchini bread that isn't very good.
Another short story, I still have a large tupperware full of shredded zucchini.
So my real purpose in writing this is to share a recipe that cut my huge tupperware in half.
The idea for this came from her: http://www.inerikaskitchen.com/2010/01/mexican-chilaquiles-breakfast-casserole.html
Such an easy one, I'll give it to you the way I did it.
1 can of black beans, rinsed
1 16 oz bottle of green sauce (I use Herdez brand green salsa as green sauce, it's my ultimate favorite, I could practically drink it out of the bottle--yeah I know, don't judge.)
1 handful of fresh cilantro
2 generous handfuls of shredded zucchini (now I have huge man-sized hands so use your own discretion, I could have added more probably)
2 handfuls of tortilla chips, roughly crushed up
some green onion and tomato
1 chicken breast, cooked and shredded (I boil my chicken with cumin, garlic, and onions)
1 handful of cheese
Mix the whole thing together, throw it in a 9x13 and top with cheese (and more cilantro, I have a weird love of cilantro too)
I baked mine for 25 minutes at 400 degrees, I could have probably baked it a little longer but I was happy with it the way it was.
And here's my casserole straight out of the oven. You can't tell but the cheese was bubbling like crazy and I was trying not to drool on both the iPod and dinner.
We topped it with some fresh guacamole, tomato, and sour cream and had some fresh, sweet watermelon with it.
Best things about this recipe:
1. The thing that drew me to this recipe was it was a 'leftover' recipe, my favorite kind. I had zucchini I needed to use. The green onion, tomato, and cilantro, were all headed out so I needed to use them too. And my chips were starting to turn too and I hate to see some good corn chips thrown out. If you have some leftover beef from tacos, rotisserie chicken, rice, any veggie you can think of that needs to be used, just toss it in the bowl!
2. It was easy. The hardest part of this was boiling my chicken breast and shredding it. I literally mixed it with my hands like a savage and then poured it into a dish. Simple as that. And it's easy to change, want to go vegetarian for the night? Skip the meat.
3. It was tasty (but I'm slightly biased, I love any and all things 'Mexican' flavored)! I'm blessed to have a husband that will eat anything but when he stands up to take his plate to the sink and exclaims "What? There's more?! Oh my gosh..." and then helps himself to another portion? I'm sold on the recipe, added to the Waldron cookbook faster than a speeding bullet. As I write this at 5:30 in the morning I'm looking forward to the lunchtime leftovers we'll be having today.
It's been forever since I've posted anything on this blog and I really wanted to share this recipe. Hope it helps someone use up the copious amount of zucchini they may have. Enjoy!
When I moved to the country, my every intention was to plant some veggies and enjoy the heck out of them. The road to no where is paved with good intentions though and my little plot of land is now growing weeds and looking very wild and unyielding. Luckily, Kerry, my friend and now neighbor has a garden and she graciously blessed me with a huge zucchini. I realized though, while I was shredding that bad boy that I was in way over my head and I couldn't possibly make that much zucchini bread.
Short story, I made waaaaay too much zucchini bread with a recipe I'd never tried and now I'm stuck bitterly eating zucchini bread that isn't very good.
Another short story, I still have a large tupperware full of shredded zucchini.
So my real purpose in writing this is to share a recipe that cut my huge tupperware in half.
The idea for this came from her: http://www.inerikaskitchen.com/2010/01/mexican-chilaquiles-breakfast-casserole.html
Such an easy one, I'll give it to you the way I did it.
1 can of black beans, rinsed
1 16 oz bottle of green sauce (I use Herdez brand green salsa as green sauce, it's my ultimate favorite, I could practically drink it out of the bottle--yeah I know, don't judge.)
1 handful of fresh cilantro
2 generous handfuls of shredded zucchini (now I have huge man-sized hands so use your own discretion, I could have added more probably)
2 handfuls of tortilla chips, roughly crushed up
some green onion and tomato
1 chicken breast, cooked and shredded (I boil my chicken with cumin, garlic, and onions)
1 handful of cheese
Mix the whole thing together, throw it in a 9x13 and top with cheese (and more cilantro, I have a weird love of cilantro too)
I baked mine for 25 minutes at 400 degrees, I could have probably baked it a little longer but I was happy with it the way it was.
And here's my casserole straight out of the oven. You can't tell but the cheese was bubbling like crazy and I was trying not to drool on both the iPod and dinner.
Best things about this recipe:
1. The thing that drew me to this recipe was it was a 'leftover' recipe, my favorite kind. I had zucchini I needed to use. The green onion, tomato, and cilantro, were all headed out so I needed to use them too. And my chips were starting to turn too and I hate to see some good corn chips thrown out. If you have some leftover beef from tacos, rotisserie chicken, rice, any veggie you can think of that needs to be used, just toss it in the bowl!
2. It was easy. The hardest part of this was boiling my chicken breast and shredding it. I literally mixed it with my hands like a savage and then poured it into a dish. Simple as that. And it's easy to change, want to go vegetarian for the night? Skip the meat.
3. It was tasty (but I'm slightly biased, I love any and all things 'Mexican' flavored)! I'm blessed to have a husband that will eat anything but when he stands up to take his plate to the sink and exclaims "What? There's more?! Oh my gosh..." and then helps himself to another portion? I'm sold on the recipe, added to the Waldron cookbook faster than a speeding bullet. As I write this at 5:30 in the morning I'm looking forward to the lunchtime leftovers we'll be having today.
It's been forever since I've posted anything on this blog and I really wanted to share this recipe. Hope it helps someone use up the copious amount of zucchini they may have. Enjoy!
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